The most important lesson that I have learned through my healing journey is that I create everything that I see in my life, and so do you.  When this comes to our health I think most of us can see that what food we put in our bodies plays a significant role in how it operates but, shocking as this might sound, I don’t believe it is the most important contributor to our health.  Our thoughts and feelings (energy vibrations) start the process.  These energy vibrations  begin in the energetic field around the body.  The word ’emotion’ comes from ‘Energy in Motion’.  Emotions want to flow as though on a river.  Often, when we consider an emotion a sign of weakness (guilt, sadness, fear), instead of letting them flow, we hide them in a dark corner of ourselves so no one else can see.  Over time and when repeated enough, these thoughts and feelings get stuck in the body if we fail to express them.  When we do this, those stuck emotions manifest as dysfunction or disease.

We all experience feedback through our bodies via colds, sore throats, or joint pain.  When we do get a physical ‘message’, it is our soul communicating that we have temporarily lost your way.  Once you are aware of the significant role emotions play in physical well-being, you will likely never look at a cold or back pain the same way again.

When I was diagnosed with the brain tumor just 9 days before my father passed away from lung cancer, I immediately sensed there was a connection, but I didn’t understand how.  In my own life, I knew several families that seemed to have a chain reaction of illnesses once a first family member was diagnosed with a disease.    Louise Hay, inspirational best-selling author, assembled a wonderful book to help us connect the dots between emotions and physical health called ‘Heal Your Body’. In it she describes the emotional cause of cancer as a ‘deep hurt, longstanding resentment, deep secret or grief eating away at the self.  Carrying hatreds, and what’s the use’ mentality’.  Certainly, I could relate to the grief, but there is more.  I didn’t like myself very much.  I often couldn’t see the point in how I was living my life.  I was never depressed, and I was always able to function just fine, but with a complete lack of zest and joy.  Brain Tumors are recognized as ‘incorrect computerized beliefs, stubbornness and refusing to change old patterns’…check, check, check.  I knew that I was unhappy, but couldn’t see the way through it.  I am also a creature of habit.  You know the kid that ate the same lunch every day in grade school?  That was me.  Predictable and patterned, even if the pattern was killing me.

Beyond the Big “C”, from colds to pimples to being overweight and arthritis, everything that happens in our body has an emotional root.  EVERYTHING.  The following are a few examples from my personal file (don’t you rubberneckers just love how I bare it all for your benefit?):

Whiteheads:  yes indeed, this was my acne of choice as a teenager.  It does not surprise me at all that whiteheads are manifestations of “hiding ugliness”.  I thought there wasn’t much good about me then so this seems right on.  Pretty hard to hide the ugliness though when you have a pus filled carbuncle on your face…thanks so much Universe :/   Acne itself represents “not accepting the self and dislike of the self”.  Blackheads are “small outbursts of anger”.  Now some of you might be thinking, but hormones rage in adolescents and that is why teenagers breakout.  But this is also the time of immense insecurity among many kids as they change.  Certainly there are a few popular kids who seem to avoid a large degree of insecurity and breeze through the teen years almost untouched by acne, but understanding the emotional cause of acne might make you ponder which comes first the self-loathing or the acne? Hopefully it will also help my friends who are parents to tweens and teens to pay attention to the signals right on their children’s faces.  Teens don’t often share too much so this could be a pretty good indicator of their emotional state of health.

Post-nasal Drip: “inner crying, childish tears, victim” I used to get a few colds each year.  They would linger for about 3 weeks.  The post-nasal drip cough kept me awake more nights than I can count.  I believed in my powerlessness.  I owned it.  I wasn’t willing to change the things in my life that sucked.  My soul, through my body, was trying to alert me to this.

Candida (yeast): “feeling very scattered, lots of frustration and anger, demanding and untrusting in relationships, great takers.”  Again, I hope you appreciate my honesty!!!  Yes, this was also me.  I had a systemic candida issue throughout my body a few years before my cancer diagnosis.  Most cancer patients have this underlying issue.  It wreaks havoc on the immune system.  I actually diagnosed myself with this once I started piling on random health issues that I felt must be connected to one another.  Of course, my doctor did not agree that my random health issues were connected, but just kept prescribing meds for vaginitis, yeast infections, eczema, dismissed my chronic and painful intestinal bloat and thought I was nuts to think my tooth dying out of the blue and requiring a root canal was cause for concern.  I brought myself back into balance a bit by significantly lowering my birth control dose (synthetic hormones as well as antibiotics are known candida agitators).  Many Americans have this same underlying health issue that Western doctors seem to not recognize except in the cases of patients near death.  Some of the most common of the many symptoms of this insidious organism overgrowth are fatigue, chronic digestive discomfort (bloating, gas, diarrhea), brain fog, severe seasonal allergies, hoo hah itching, skin and nail fungal infections, and strong sugar and refined carb cravings.  I bet it sounds familiar to many out there.  On an emotional level I was angry and frustrated by my life circumstances, yet I felt powerless to change it.  I was also too demanding of my husband Mike (as I publish this I realize that he will now hold this over me until the end of time), although my annoyance with excessive golf is entirely justified. All you golf widows out there know what I am talking about….

Miscarriage:  “fear, fear of the future, “not now, later”, inappropriate timing”.  I had several miscarriages, 2 requiring a D & C.  All occurred between my children, Aidan and Kyra.  All of them also occurred while Mike and I were living in Albany, New York for a short time.  The move to Albany, although good for its proximity to our family, was bad in every other way.  We had loved living in Kingston, Massachusetts.  We had loved our house, our community, the beach, being so close to Boston and Cape Cod, but when the announcement came through State Street Corp, where both Mike and I worked, that they were offering voluntary severance packages to all employees we jumped at the chance.  We figured it would be a great way for me to start staying home with Aidan permanently and in a place where the cost of living was much less expensive.  Almost as soon as we signed papers on our new house in Albany we started thinking about coming back to Massachusetts.  We had been going through the motions and following expectations, but not at all listening to our inner guidance.  My body would not accept a baby until we aligned with what felt right.  I did finally conceive my beautiful Kyra in Albany, but not until after we agreed that we were definitely moving back to Massachusetts.  We moved back to Kingston when I was 6 months pregnant with Kyra.

And my personal favorite:

Incurable: “Cannot be cured by outer means at this point.  We must go within to effect the cure.  It came from nowhere and will go back to nowhere.”  This becomes more meaningful to me every day as I take ownership of everything that I experience.

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Once you become aware of these patterns it becomes easier to see why certain public figures manifest issues.  I often think of Joe Paterno, former coach of Penn State who ended his coaching career amidst the horrific scandal of his assistant coach’s child sexual abuse charges. Many questioned what Joe Paterno knew.  Only 2 months after being fired, he was dead from a fast moving lung cancer.  I also think of Dana Reeves, wife of Christopher Reeves who died of lung cancer (as a non-smoker) very soon after her husband passed away.  It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see a connection.  I’m sure you know people in your own lives for whom this rings true.

We are what we feel.  Nothing is random.  The more we can embrace this truth, the more the events of our lives make sense.  I strongly encourage you to either purchase Louise Hay’s book Heal Your Body, which is a list in alphabetical order of common complaints and their corresponding emotional pattern or her recently added Heal Your Body A-Z app in the iTunes store for $4.99.   Now you can go around annoying everybody you meet by explaining the source of their dysfunction ….  No, please don’t do that!  But, the next time physical pain or illness comes around, ask yourself  what has been emotionally stressful lately.  This isn’t about blaming, but more like the honest mirror that really tells you how that bathing suit looks on you when no one else will.

Empower yourself by recognizing that your emotional health is paramount to your physical well-being.  Feel it to heal it…

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The following are a few more common ailments and emotional causes that I suspect you may have encountered:

Accidents: Inability to speak up for the self, Rebellion against authority, Belief in violence.

Back Pain (Lower): Fear of money, lack of financial support

Back Pain (Middle): Guilt, stuck in all that stuff back there,  “get off my back”

Back Pain (Upper):  Lack of emotional support, feeling unloved, holding back love

Breast problems (cysts, lumps, mastitis):  A refusal to nourish the self.  Putting everyone else first, overmothering, overprotection, overbearing attitudes

Bursitis: Repressed anger, wanting to hit someone

Cataracts: Inability to see ahead with joy, Dark future

Colds: Too much going on at once.  Mental confusion, disorder, Small hurts, “I get 3 colds every winter” type of belief

Cold Sores: Festering angry words and fear of expressing them.

Colitis: Insecurity, Represents the ease of letting go of that which is over

Headaches: Invalidating the self, self-criticism, fear (different causes for migraines)

Hives: Small, hidden fears, mountains out of molehills.

Infection:  Irritation, anger, annoyance

Overweight:  Fear, need for protection.  Running away from feelings.  Insecurity, self-rejection.  Seeking fulfillment.

Psoriasis: Fear of being hurt.  Deadening the senses of the self.  Refusing to accept responsibility for our own feelings

Sore Throat: Holding in angry words.  Feeling unable to express the self.

Thyroid Issues (hyper, hypo, goiter): Humiliation. “I never get to do what I want to do.  When is it going to be my turn?