The judgments have to stop. The tearing other people down has to stop. The ‘jokes’ at other people’s expense have to stop.
This post was inspired by the latest Facebook hoax about privacy settings. I’m totally cool with kindly letting your Facebook friends know that it was a hoax. That’s being a friend. What I have seen a whole lot of is making fun of the people who believed it; making all kinds of comparisons and talking down to the ‘poor, pathetic suckers’. While I did not believe this particular hoax, this feels personal because I AM a citizen of this world and I do not wish to sit quietly by while some people choose to make other people feel small. I have a voice and I want to use it for good.
I ask you: what are you trying to prove with your sarcasm? These are your ‘friends’ right? These are people that you either requested to be friends with or accepted a friend request from. Why do you need to feel superior? You aren’t being a friend. A friend wouldn’t do that. You are being a cyber bully. All the people who ‘like’ your malicious post are accomplices to it.
What does it say about you that your social media posts are snarky, passive aggressive or cruel? What does it say about you if you are always focused on the differences you notice with people rather than the similarities? Why in the name of good God would you ever want to embarrass or insult someone by publicly shaming them or their views? Who do you think you are that you get to have that power over someone else? Sure they can choose to ignore you, a good choice, but deep in their heart, your words hurt…just like they would hurt you if you were insulted. You know this, but you choose to cyber bully anyway. The cyber bullies are a smart bunch; intellectually, not emotionally and they use it to harm. Emotionally intelligent people would never intentionally hurt others.
Why is our default setting ‘separateness’? Why do Democrats and Republicans hate each other so much? Don’t they recognize that if a massive storm came and wiped out people’s homes no one would care at all which political party they belonged to? We’d all just help our neighbors.
Why do we need monumental crises to bring us together? Do you remember how this country felt after September 11th, 2001? There was a lot of fear and concern about what would happen next, but beyond that there was patriotism. There was a coming together of different ideologies united against terrorism. People were proud to be American; to be a part of an ideology that TOLERATED differences and even ceIebrated them. It was an inspiring display.
Social media is an amazing gift when we use it for good instead of evil. I believe in the inherent goodness of people and that’s why it makes me want to cry when I see how we hurt each other in the guise of a joke or clarification. Ellen Degeneres is one of the funniest people alive and yet she manages to achieve that without ever making someone else feel smaller. Stop going for the cheap laugh or demeaning, ‘I know more than you’ comment to satisfy your ego.
Let’s raise the level of discourse. Let’s focus on what we can do to build each other up and build a better world, not on tearing people down based on petty differences. We teach our children to look out for cyber bullying, and yet here are the adults modelling that very behavior. Whether you are Christian or not, Jesus’ commandment “as I have loved you, so you must love one another” feels right. We are so much better than we are choosing to behave. It’s time to change for the better.