“Life is not measured by the amount of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.” That sounds lovely and inspiring, and I couldn’t disagree more. We all have those amazing moments in life that we can never forget. The births of my children are the two happiest moments of my life as I‘m sure many of you would agree. The euphoria I felt in the car on the way to my father’s death bed, that I discovered was the moment he passed to the other side, will also always be extraordinarily important to me, but we do not build a life on breath-taking moments, we build a life on routine, of sameness and that should be beautiful too.

As I walked this morning with a friend he mentioned to me that almost every person he knew hated their job. Well THAT sucks. It is nearly impossible to appreciate the goodness of your life when you are miserable for a large portion of it. It’s why most of society looks forward to vacations, that one or two weeks a year when you get a taste of what life would be like if you were spending it doing what you enjoy.

I think my degree in life education, with a masters in scary illness, provided me with a much needed smack in my perspective. In many ways, I am blessed with the gift of broader perspective. I understand exactly what those on their deathbeds say about their deep regrets because I was given that same gift, just much earlier when I still had time to make changes so that I did not live with regret. I’ve seen many versions of the regrets of the dying. The Huffington Post just released another one:

At the end of their lives people say:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Not one of these asks for more breath-taking moments. Not one of these is a regret about not going after the brass ring. All are about recognizing the gift of the present moment, of the tapestry of life that is sewn together with a stream of everyday events.

I am bored with chasing ecstatic, Facebook-worthy moments. It isn’t sustainable and it is the task of those trying to project happiness instead of being truly happy.

I have discovered profound joy in the spaces in between; the quiet (and sometimes loud if you have kids) breath of daily life with its inhales and exhales.

1. I enjoy driving to pick up my son after school as I notice my town out the window, listen to the radio and on the trip home, hear him talk about his day…something that doesn’t always come willingly from a 13 year old.

2. I adore my daily walks at Bay Farm and my amazing family there. These nature and dog-loving peeps fill me with JOY. Nobody cares what kind of car you are driving, nobody cares your age. I have friends in their 20s and friends in their 70s and I love them all and their canine companions. It is a place of loving acceptance sans makeup and pretense.

3. I enjoy waking up before 6 a.m. and getting organized for the day. I love my morning smoothie, my bone broth and my cups of tea.

4. My heart skips a beat when my daughter gets off the bus. This glorious, free-spirited 10 year old usually has her backpack half opened, contents spilling out of it, and is either happy to be home or scowling about being bullied on the bus…it happens to her sometimes.

5. I love the honor of teaching my children to navigate our ultra-competitive society, while not succumbing to it and maintaining their sense of themselves.

6. I love when dinner is over and my husband, my kids and I sit down to watch the Amazing Race or Master Chef or Modern Family.

Life is measured by breath. Some breaths are glorious, some breaths suck, and many leave no traceable emotion. All of it is the breath of life and all of it is glorious if you actually stop to appreciate it. Ponder your life. Do you love it, hate it, have no opinion about it? Don’t wait too long before you figure out what truly matters to you and do everything you can to align yourself with what your heart wants.

A friend shared this quote from Martha Beck today and I just needed to include it here in closing.

“Our culture has come to define happiness as an experience that blows your mind. It’s as though we’re somehow falling short if we don’t routinely feel the way Times Square looks—madly pulsing with a billion watts of Wow! Don’t get me wrong. Excitement is a great and necessary thing; without it life wouldn’t be complete. But happiness—real happiness—is something entirely different, at once calmer and more rewarding. And cultivating it is one of the most important steps we can take toward creating fulfilling lives. ” ~Martha Beck

Be real, be honest, and be in love with the gift of everyday, ordinary life.

<3
Erin